What to do if You’re Intimidated by a Colleague
If you're intimidated by a colleague establish why this is so. Is it because they're aggressive and use bullying tactics? Or is it because you lack confidence and professional skills? The answer will leave you with one of several directions to head in to enable you to achieve a positive outcome. Intimidation can be experienced due to the manipulative behaviour of another, because of misconceptions and poor communication, or be put down to low self esteem.
Manipulative behavior
Unfortunately some playground child bullies grow up to become office aggressors, still using manipulative behavior to get what they want. Their behavior is usually due to a lack of real skills on their part. Bullying takes up the space where capability should step in. If you are being intimidated by an office bully there are several steps you can take to stop their behavior.
There is no real point attempting to negotiate with an obvious bully. They will see you trying to be reasonable as a sign of weakness. Instead, find out where you stand professionally within your position of work. Perhaps you have a manager who can assist you by keeping an eye on the bullies behavior or by taking them aside to talk to them.
You may find you can be transferred from one department to another where the bully doesn't work. Or, you could inform the bully that you aren't interested and tell them to keep a professional distance or you will take positive action against them. Try not to say this in a threatening manner, merely state it as a fact.
Poor communication
Ask yourself if it's possible that the colleague you experience as being intimidating really has the intention of coming across this way. Some employees will naturally be abrupt in the way they communicate and lack social skills which help them get along smoothly with others.
Also delve into the possibility that the intimidating colleague may have false misconceptions about you. Have they any reason to doubt you? If so, make an effort to verbally clear up any lack of understanding or communication blocks which may be standing in the way of an ideal professional relationship.
Low self esteem
It's easy to feel put down and intimidated by more confident employees than yourself. Where this is the case consider further training to help you move up in your career, and take steps to improve your social life so that feelings relating to work don't take precedence every day. Increase self confidence by spending time with helpful colleagues who are supportive and understanding.
There's no good reason for putting up with intimidation from a colleague at work, and positive action should be taken to improve the situation. Consider your options and empower yourself by increasing confidence and knowledge so you feel happier in the work-place.
