ALT-4 What to do if your best Man Bails
What to do if the best man bails
You choose your best man based on trust, nothing more, nothing less. Your best man is either going to be your brother or your best friend, someone you have either spent your lifetime with or at least many years. In the event your best man bails, I think you should first be concerned with the reason why. No best man is going to buckle under the stress of a wedding, that is not his own. So to look at this situation in a more positive light, than the scum just didn't show up or decided to take off to the Bahamas for a few days with a hottie he met at a bar the night before is unlikely. Perhaps he is sick, was in a car accident, out of town prior to the wedding and was delayed due to bad weather etc
Now if your best man lets you know at least one day in advance, you will have plenty of time to bump up a groomsman to the best man position and replace the groomsmen with a someone else. You can rent a tux in under an hour at most shops.
To choose which groomsmen to move up to best man, should be your first groomsmen, the one that stands next to the best man, keeping this possibility in mind when planning your wedding is a good idea, you never know when the unexpected is going to happen. So be sure to have an alternate groomsmen, ideally he could serve as an usher and help seat guests and such and if he is needed to step in then he is ready, if not he will be seated with the rest of the guests. I don't think any man would see it as an insult to be available as a groomsmen if needed and to help seat guests and other small tasks. Be sure to include him as one of your bridal party. The bride should do the same thing, in case her maid of honor is unable to attend.
I personally, find it to be very tacky and disrespectful to ask a groomsmen or bridesmaid to step down, after they have invested all the money in a dress and shoes and the tuxedo and gifts for the bride and groom.
Don't allow this to happen at your wedding, be prepared for the worst and expect the best. Having two extra people dressed and available to step in if needed is the wise thing to do. Just be sure to remember, what they have done to help make your wedding special and a little less stressful by being available.
