How to get your Girlfriend to Marry you
You’ve met the woman of your dreams, been dating for a while and have now decided you’d like to take it one step further and marry her, but how do you get your girlfriend to marry you? It’s fairly simple once you know the qualities that most women look for in men when choosing a life partner.
Attributes that Attract Women
1. While physical attraction plays a part in a union, for women this attraction usually occurs after being attracted to his personality. So if the two of you can talk and she finds your conversation interesting, you have made a major step forward. Some women get frustrated if during a conversation, the man changes the subject to discuss something about himself (for instance, if she says she likes a particular food and then he spends the next ten minutes telling her why he hates it). Listening is probably one of the most important husband skills you can ever develop. If a woman feels that you have heard her and are genuinely interested in her, then she will feel liked and respected.
Of course you can talk about yourself and your own interests, but don’t cut in over a different conversation.
2. It is usually better to have several interests in common, especially in major subjects like religion, how to bring up children, politics and other ‘hot topics’. Although many couples stay happily married for years when they have very differing views, it may be easier if you are on the same page from the start.
3. If you do disagree on something and she tries to discuss it with you, don’t follow on with a list of her faults or what she has done. This isn’t listening to her problem or attempting to solve it, it is point scoring and she will feel ignored and as if her feelings don’t matter. Never go to bed angry. If you can tell her you love her every day and always kiss and make up after a disagreement, you’re more likely to be viewed as husband material.
4. Being self-confident helps. If she knows you are sure of yourself and trust in your own judgement and abilities she is more likely to find you attractive. Women can sense when a man doesn’t believe in himself and if he doesn’t, why should she? On the flip side of the coin, don’t overdo this. Always thinking you are right and you know more than her isn’t attractive. She will want a husband who considers her his equal.
5. Having a sense of humor is important to a lot of women. You don’t have to be a stand-up comedian or put on an act, but just being yourself and having the ability to make her laugh will lift her day and make her want to be with you. ‘Playfulness’ is very important in a relationship. It not only makes you attractive, but when real life, kids and every day mundane things crop up to take out the ‘romance’, being able to joke about it all will give you a stronger relationship.
6. Women like to feel as if their man is protecting them. This sounds a bit ‘cavewoman’ like but it’s true. A man who can protect his woman is a turn on. These days of course you won’t be protecting her from bears (unless you’re going through some kind of camping disaster), but from anything she feels she needs solid support for. Do you come out on her side when there’s a family feud? If your friend insulted her, would you defend her? Were you a shoulder to cry on when she had trouble at work? That is modern day protection and if she feels you are always on her side no matter what, that you are her rock through thick and thin, she is not going to want to leave you. She will reward you with fierce loyalty and usually find you more sexually attractive as a result. On the other hand, a man who constantly cancels dates with his girlfriend, fails to show up on time, forgets her birthday or would rather sit glued to the TV with his friends than spend the afternoon with her is unlikely to be viewed as reliable enough material for a husband. Of course it’s fine to have friends (and even healthy to have separate interests – you don’t want to kill the relationship by overcrowding), but not if they always take first place.
7. If you’re going to spend hours playing golf at least look interested when she tells you about her hobbies and make the effort to take her out to dinner or the movies on a regular basis, particularly if your own hobbies take up lots of time.
8. Do you like her family? Remember if you are considering marriage, it’s not just the girl you will be marrying but her whole family and if you can’t stand her mother, or her mother can’t stand you, this may be a problem. Make an effort to get to know her family and be friendly towards them. If there is a family event, don’t make excuses not to go. Always attend even if you dislike it, you may win them around. Many marriages are destroyed by in-laws or other relations who do not accept the relationship. Likewise, if your potential wife doesn’t feel accepted by your family and you always defend your mother over her, this could create a problem. Family interactions and how you both deal with them should be discussed prior to marriage.
9. For most women, when they are looking for a husband they also check out his fathering abilities (unless they don’t plan on having children). She may be watching how you are with her younger siblings or nieces and nephews. Do you smile at little children? Do you think babies are cute? Some men won’t admit to this if they do think babies are cute, but your girlfriend will be checking for signs of paternal instinct in you if she is considering a long-term future with you. If you already have a child from a previous relationship, she may be looking at your relationship with him or her. Do you have similar ideas about children and how many you would like, if at all?
10. Lastly, are you sexually compatible in the long-term? You are talking about sleeping with the same person for the rest of your life, so this is a big deal. If all of the other factors are fine, you are best friends as well as partners and your girlfriend thinks you’re interesting and funny then the sexual part of it should just slot into place (if you’ll pardon the pun). For most women it is personality that makes them want a man sexually, but even so, it would be good to make yourself as physically attractive to her as possible. Banish that excess facial hair if you know she doesn’t like it (and no plucking nose hairs in front of her!). While you shouldn’t change yourself for her, it’s you she likes – if you know she can’t stand beards, don’t go and grow a new one. Contrary to popular belief, women are interested in sex, and we don’t want to be put off.
If you’ve made an effort on all ten points and you love her to bits, then basically she’d be crazy not to marry you!
