How to Balance the Moments of every Day Life
The most important aspect of getting more value and balance in life is to know what is valued and what is considered balance. For a "must have all the toys" driven ambitious person, having value means squeezing the most out of every second worked for money. For someone who values more quality time with family, the exact opposite is true. For this person, the old adage that at death no one says: "Oh if only I spent more time at my job." rings true.
With the state of the world today, many are realizing that their work is just a means to an end. Once they are out ofdebtand no longer "owned" by lenders, and the necessity of having to make a living, they find the thought of freedom quite liberating. But, more often, people in the modern economy with a greatly diminished share of "having it all" realize they will have to do some kind of work in order to continue to support family even into retirement years. In such a case, the best solution is to find work that is loved.
Doing what one loves, having meaning in doing it, and finding fulfillment in awaking every day to a life one both values and balances is the best of both worlds. Here are four ways to help ascertain if such an approach is possible and can be attained.
1) Most of having what you want is wanting what you have.
If you have family, a good spouse, a place to call home and a gift for using the present skills you already have to keep all these things, you are more than halfway there. Take a mental inventory while preparing for the day each morning and while getting ready to go to bed each night. Ask yourself what great things were experienced this day. A comment from a co-worker, a bird singing on a branch at lunch, a walk with a friend, a solving of a challenging task, getting all the green lights en route, finding an item long searched for and wanted, or even being greeted by a loving pet at the end of the day. One of the greatest drawbacks to modern life is the distracting pace which with most people get caught up. Take time to offer yourself, and the external world, a moment to be grateful and relaxed for all you have. Ask yourself if you can take an extra moment to make each moment more precious.
2) Having taken the time to notice the rest of the world, engage with it.
Think about everything from your mentalappreciationlist above. If you saw a bird making a nest, indulge a little more time into thinking and maybe even exploring such a miracle of the every day. Ask meaningful questions from others, and be genuine in finding something about them that is interesting, admirable and worth sharing. It is not that hard to start with a smile, and to find something about almost everyone that you can like, or at the very least, be fascinated enough to learn more about. It is the same with the rest of the world. You are made of energy, atoms and inter-active systems. Find out your relational DNA to every living, and sustaining entity, in your world and you will be much more aware and appreciative of the gifts of life all around you.
3) Think about values, and what is attached to them.
Values is a word that often slips right by. People think they know what they value, getting a new car, a raise, a better house and so on are usually on everyone's list of what they want most. But when you examine your total life and review what brought you the greatest happiness, it is more likely experiences, time with loved ones, a summer vacation long ago to the Grand Canyon, beach, or forest that proves rewarding. Money does matter, but when it is the goal rather than the means towards finding value, it corrupts human dreams and makes people either exploitative, or feeling exploited themselves. Gaining the advantage becomes more important than finding relationships with others, settings, places, belonging and community of human and more than human world. If you value fitness for example, eating healthier food, breathing clean air, conserving soil and water all become second nature towards supporting your values.
4) Think about balance, and what balance brings to life.
Balance, like values, is going to be personally defined not by your words, but by your actions. Balance is hard to achieve. Follow nature to find how everything is dependent upon everything else, and balance is about cooperation between systems. For a seed to bloom requires a balance between sunshine, living soil, right amount of rain, systems of wind, pollination,animal participation and much more. Finding balance in the human life may mean re-attaching yourself to how these nurturing systems provide air you breathe, food you eat, views you see, weather you must accommodate, and so forth. Ask your engaged sense what helps you feel "oneness" with belonging to the world.
In your time management of every day, are you wasting lots of time just being distracted by tasks, noise, traffic, messaging, and artificial technology? Connection directly, answering the phone, say, saves time because you are not wasting others time by making them leave messages. Deal directly with things as they come up, rather than just accumulating tons of tasks in unmanageable and unbalanced piles.
Technology, if used right saves time. It connects rather than avoids. It serves rather than being a harsh task master we are constantly serving. Like a car, it should help one get there, not subtract a certain number of hours from your life spent in traffic, noise, toxic fumes and stress. Audio books are good for making use of commute time, and car pooling with others connects to others even more directly.
All of these considerations should add value and balance to a life. If a person still feels undervalued and unbalanced, take a total life inventory, ask yourself what you want to get and give to the short time you spend on earth. For some, this means they sell their stuff, liberate themselves from clutter and rat race, and opt for a simpler life free of stuff, debt, toil and feeling consumed.
