Tailgate Terror
What is it with people who tailgate on a busy thoroughfare? Yesterday when I was driving on an interstate with heavy traffic and major roadwork, one of the tailgating terrors was making me very nervous. The posted speed limit was 40, but traffic was really moving along at about 45. That, however, was not good enough for the 30-something, overly anxious male driver who was trying to move everyone along by getting as close to rear bumpers as possible. Mind you, there were construction crews doing roadwork all along this stretch of highway, as well as signage about every 400 yards announcing gigantic fines with jail time for speeders.
Not to be deterred, the tailgate terror kept switching between two lanes, creeping as close as was physically possible to the bumper of the car ahead, then weaving back and forth to get every driver's attention. Due to the road construction work and the rush hour traffic, there really was no place for anyone to go to get out of the way of this maniac driver. Even though he was within inches of my rear bumper at one time, I was fascinated, not terrified, by his actions. Hoping to avoid a string of rear end crashes, I slowed down enough so that he could get around me, where he proceeded to terrorize the next car.
The bumper hugger, of course, was going nowhere because of the very heavy stream of traffic. But that fact did not stop him from trying to move many dozens of cars out of his way by tailgating. Shortly after I let him get around me, he started honking his horn at the next car he was tailgating. Now I was really fascinated by his maniacal driving style. He could not get away from the traffic, and we could not get away from him. I kept trying to imagine a rational reason for why he was acting so stupidly. Was he rushing to the hospital for the birth of a child? Was he seriously late to work? Was he a bridegroom with a church full of anxious guests? The more I looked at him, though, the more convinced I was that he was none of these.
Like most tailgaters, he was a menace to himself and to everyone else who had the misfortune to be on the same road with him. Some people deal with a tailgater by slowing down in order to frustrate the tailgater even more. When dealing with a driving demon, though, I think it is most sensible to get as far away from him as possible. Let someone else cope with whiplash and a smashed bumper!
