How to Handle Brown Nosers
Do you have problems with termites at work? Termites you ask? Termites are my code word for brown-nosing employees who are constantly chewing on the boss's wood. Don't call the Orkin man. These pests can only be controlled through public embarrassment.
Once a Brown-Noser, Always a Brown Noser
You can't change the way people are. We have to deal with the hand dealt to us. If you are faced with a hungry termite at work, be prepared to deal with it. Keep in mind that termites chew on the boss's wood for a reason. Personal gain, acceptance, or hunger for wood - ultimately motivates brown-nosers. Understand that you cannot change the path the termite has already taken. They are programmed to eat wood and that's it.
Dealing With Termites
Working with a termite is easy as long as you are a confident individual. If you have no problem speaking your mind, dealing with these insects can be pure entertainment. Make sure you initially let your co workers know that their is a termite walking amongst them. After everyone knows the identity of the termite, let the verbal bashing begin. Start calling the brown-noser "termite". When the termite makes their regular visit to the boss's office, ask the termite if he or she would like a glass of water? The termite will ask you why? Tell them that water helps break down splinters in their digestive system. You can tell the termite that since they were going into the boss's office to take care of the boss's root, they might as well water it while they are there. Termites may laugh off the first couple snide remarks. A continual bombardment of termite related comments can weaken the enemy. Once your termite co worker has been weakened by verbal abuse, and tired of being the outsider, they will try to show the rest of the co workers that they no longer desire wood. The termite will try to befriend everyone in the office and slip into obscurity. Keep a watchful eye on the little bugger. They love wood and it's only a matter of time before the wet hole under their nose is chewing on it again.
Repair Office Damage After a Termite Infestation
You can always pull the termite aside and let he or she know that eating wood is bad. The termite will always eat wood, but make them realize that eating wood destroys the structural integrity of your office environment. You can never totally eradicate termites from the office environment, but you can control how much wood the termite eats. Happy termite hunting!
