Five Steps to Avoid Negative Gossip
Whenever people are together in a group, they will talk. Each person will recount stories of woe, joy, accomplishment and aspirations for the future. As people in a workplace environment get to know each other, there are several alternative ways that a closeness can be shared, which is essential for success individually and in a group.
Cohesiveness within co-workers can be cultivated without effort, for example, when a particularly difficult task is presented to a team with a fast approaching deadline. Suddenly people are communicating more, working cooperatively, and have become exceptionally motivated. A bond may also occur in simply interacting with one another and realizing common interests and goals.As co-workers begin to become familiar and closer, personality types and opinions come to light. As a result, gossip occurs. Here are five steps to avoid negative gossip.
First, identify positive gossip. When people think of gossip, a hurtful group memories, words, and people come to mind. However, not all gossip is bad. Positive gossip can maintain a light chemistry between co-workers and teach others the impact of being pleasant without having to explain this conceptually. This behavior benefits everyone and thwarts those pessimists who find it productive and important to complain. A few examples of positive gossip would be choosing to spread the personal excitement that a friend's baby was delivered or exchanging humorous stories about family. Remaining pleasant during conversations creates amiable relations, and over time will silently send the message that negativity is not welcome. Even though it may not be obvious, this energy creates an enormous impact in group chemistry and morale.
Second, keep a secret. Typically, personal disclosure between people is acted upon by choice and should remain that way. Respect privacy in the workplace (unless the facts may create serious damage to another), no matter what the content of the information or the intention behind it. Whether directly involved or on the periphery, recall that the right to divulge information is only acceptable when it is yours to give. While this may appear to be a benefit to others, it far more honorable to keep the information private. Self respect and the respect of others is bound to follow.
Third, understand human nature. Although it would be wonderful to completely avoid adversity, it is impossible where groups are concerned. Remember, the type of person that enjoys vocalizing information that is not his/her's to share, is usually bored and uninteresting. Most people using antagonistic gossip are unaware of the social implication, gain a sense of importance by revealing information, and have a difficult time confronting people. Unfortunately, devious gossip is sometimes used as a method to bond between people, as misdirected as this may be.
Fourth, own your words. When speaking, choose words wisely. Imagine being confronted with what you are about to say as a check-in for whether or not to express it. Each one of us has had the experience of offending somebody unintentionally or reacting emotionally towards someone and regretting it. Remind yourself that what you say is exclusively your decision, therefore your consequence. Attempt to communicate clearly, use judgment in responses, and practice active listening.
Fifth: Stop nosy people. There is a difference between genuine interest and seeking information for malice. At first, it may be difficult to gauge that a co-worker's actions involve this motivation . There are people who are repeatedly preoccupied with gathering potentially controversial information and those that are interested in a specific person or incident for personal reasons only. Gather information by observation and figure out the difference. If a co-worker is abnormally focused on finding out about a variety of people, keep the amount of time spent with this person directed towards work. If during work this person directs the chat towards intrusive questions at the expense of others, the best bet is to display a disinterest. It is possible to change the subject, respond generically to questions, and/or claim ignorance. Blocking a chance to gain juicy information is what the doctor ordered to shut this behavior down. This type of person does not deserve more energy than is allowed by you.
When all else fails, grab some music, put on headphones if allowed, and turn it up.
