A Valentine for the Broken Hearted
Yes, it's going to be tough. The Festival of Romance seems like a cruel joke, reminding you of what you have lost. The good news is, it will be over soon. On February 15th, things will be back to normal.
Under no circumstances rush out to shop for a replacement sweetie. Rebound relationships are an exploitation of the new partner, and almost always end in disaster. You could ruin a perfectly good friendship or future relationship that way. If you have your eyes on someone, keep things low-key on Valentine's Day. We all need time to grieve our losses, and breakup survivors are no exception.
If you are in the habit of sending Valentine greetings to friends and family members, continue as usual. It may not be as much fun as other years, but reaching out to others is therapeutic. Make an extra effort to reach out to those who are feeling that they have nobody. Misery loves company. When we try to cheer somebody else up, we often discover that we have cheered ourselves up as well.
In the spirit of St. Valentine, think about doing something loving for someone else. This might be a great day to visit Grandma at the nursing home and ask her to reminisce about her romantic experiences. Help out at the food bank or soup kitchen. Invite a lonely person for lunch. Take a child to the zoo, the science center, or an amusement park. Make an anonymous gift. Perform one or more random acts of kindness.
Distract yourself. Go out to see a funny movie. Go skating, swimming, or running. Suit up for an aerobics class. Participate in a sport. Get a massage. Read that book you've been planning to get to.
Revive your sense of humour. Organize a Pity Party for yourself and other breakup survivors. Fantasize about what you would say and do if your lover came back. Think up creative punishments. Write a funny rap or poem about the break-up experience. If none of these options sound like fun, then think of something that is. Your life is not over just because a certain person is no longer in it. Who knows? The next chapter of your life could be better than you ever imagined.
If none of the above work for you, then mope. Be as miserable as you possibly can. Focus on your misery, wallow in it, make it into an art form. Listen to all your favorite songs and use up a box of Kleenex. After a while, you will get bored and move on.
Tomorrow is another day. It is the first day of the rest of your life. Anything could happen.
