ALT-5 How to Receive a Lousy Gift Graciously
The experience is universal. It's happened to all of us, opening a gift and feeling your stomach drop. You aren't sure what to say, and you may not even be certain what it is. Your loved one is looking at you with anticipation, and you are trying not to show your confusion, your disappointment, or your all out rage.
What you need to keep in mind is that most people give gifts with the best of intentions. Rare is the person who wants to annoy or upset you when offering a present. This unusual beast will get pleasure out of your displeasure, so don't let it show. Just smile, say thank you, and move on to the next gift. Better yet, act like it's the best thing you've ever received and gush all over the giver. That will come as a shock and force a change in tactics for the next time.
If you've just opened an unintentionally lousy gift, get that poker face on. Grace under pressure, it's not always easy to come by, but muster if from somewhere. Relax those eyebrows, unless you can make horror look like happy surprise. Pull up those mouth corners not into a grimace. Think smile. Remember it's the thought that counts, and simply say thanks. Give the person a hug and let them know you appreciate him and his thoughtfulness. The gift itself is really not important, but your relationship is.
Honesty is generally considered to be the best policy, but feelings take priority over brutal frankness. If the first thing out of your loved one's mouth is "You can take it back," you've done a lousy job hiding your disdain. Some people are OK with returns and would rather give you something you really want. In this case, polite honesty is acceptable. You can respond with, "We'll go together and you can help me choose." This still involves the giver and lets him see what sort of gift you would prefer in future; it's a win-win.
Over the years, I have received some real stinkers in the gift department. I've had to display some tacky "art" and wear some ugly clothes in the presence of my loved ones. Hopefully, I did this with grace and aplomb. The hints I dropped before birthdays and Christmas seem to have worked. It's been a long time since I've had to force a smile after taking off the wrapping on a truly lousy gift. No one's feelings have been devastated, so everyone is still willing to give. But they're getting better at it.
