ALT-2 The Engagement an Identity Crisis for Professional Women
In today’s day and age, with many couples waiting until they are a bit older and more financially settled before getting married, women are establishing themselves more and more in their careers prior to getting hitched. For a woman who has worked hard to establish herself in her field of expertise to suddenly change her name and become someone’s wife can be a bit of a shell shock. She can feel as though her entire world is being turned upside down. Truly, not much has changed and the transition just takes some getting used to, but it can be rather unsettling for the professional woman who has always been independent and handled things on her own.
The tradition of taking the man’s name after marriage is an old one and today many woman are opting to hyphenate, stringing their maiden name and their married name together or simply forgo the married name altogether and keep the maiden name. The reasons behind this can be complicated. Many professional women feel as though they have spent a lot of time and energy establishing a brand behind their name and to have to change that name can be difficult. People won’t automatically associate her reputation with her married name – at least not right away – and it can often feel like starting from scratch.
For women who have built something of a brand based on their name, the hyphen can be an incredibly useful tool. Other women opt to keep their maiden name where their business is concerned and take their husband’s last name in all other areas. However, this can become confusing. The hyphen can help a professional woman transition more smoothly from her single life to her married life.
Many professional women also have a tough time transitioning from single life to married life because they have a certain image of themselves in their mind and being somebody’s wife goes against that image. Perhaps it is the image of marriage and being a wife that needs adjusting. Marriage does not need to mean submission to a man or a sacrifice of independence. It is a partnership, just like any professional partnership. Women that have a tough time adjusting to the idea often need to adjust their perception of what it means to be married in the modern world.
The irony in professional women having an identity crisis after becoming engaged or married is that they are feeding right into stereotypes that they have worked hard to overcome in their professional lives.
