ALT-2 Secrets to Enjoying Family Holidays
When it comes to the holiday season like Thanksgiving, it's traditional to always be very thankful for what you have. What I am most grateful for this year is the love of my fiancee. Who has stood by my side throughout most of my dilemmas. However, some things are tough to deal with when it comes to certain issues with you family that you REALLY have to be gratefull for what you have totally.
My mother and I have been at odds for years. We love each other in our own way, but we have never really gotten along as much as I'd like. I'm more compassionate, and she's more judgmental. My sense of her anger probably started with her living in a very strict household, and growing up with 2 brothers who were totally mean to her. Wehn she took her anger out on me, I always got a sense it was about her past. It really only added to her a temper, and whenever I tried to explain something, she would never listen. Whether it was for small or huge issues, I felt afraid of her. Often this anger lead to physical abuse (though not always). Things only became worse after an arguement involved my fiancee. At that point I had had enough, and I lost my own temper right back. I knew I could not be there anymore so I moved in with my fiancee whom I had been staying with ever since.
So after that decision (which in a way was forced upon me) my fiancee welcomed me with open arms. At the same time I was scared because it was the first time I was living alone with a woman I love, and I did not want to be a burden to her. It was not an easy because I did miss my old home, but at the same time, I'm very blessed to have a lady who loves me, and a home.
My mother and I did not speak for a while after that "incident," but then maybe a year or so she started to talk to me after that. Mostly because I am still her baby boy, and I WILL always love her even for her faults. It took a while, but I feel the distance helped to heal old wounds
When it comes to my father, my mother lied about past actions he had supposedly done years ago, and they have been divorced since I was a baby. So I never really met my father until I was 25 years old. I was reluctant because of the lie my mother told. However, as I got to finally know him better, I realized it was a huge lie that was blown out of proportions. To this day, I have always hated my mother for what she said. However, it took a long time to fully let go of it because I realized I would be no differant than she is if I ignored her completely. I was welcomed with full loving arms by both my father and step-mother. They have both been wonderful, and have been there for me with many problems like losing my first job, and the issues my girlfriend.
My family although dysfunctional is a wonderful thing, and its the MAIN secret to enjoying a holiday. Do I wish things were better? Yes. However, it takes time for that to happen. I am very grateful that the ones I love are a part of my life. It makes things better.
