ALT-1 Do we really need Mothers Fathers Day to Show our Appreciation
Appreciation can be shown in many forms, but none is more questionable then an instance where it seems it has to be shown because a calendar states it should. Commonly known as "Hallmark" days, our lives are riddled with more and more reasons to have to visit our nearest gift shop for cards, flowers or candy to tell someone, materially, what should be automatically spoken throughout the year.
Mother's and Father's day seems to be the most ridiculous of all the celebrations. The reasoning for that statement is really quite simple: we shouldn't need a reminder to celebrate our parents; they should be honored daily for who they are. This doesn't mean we need to gift them each and every morning for who they mean to us or what they've done; it simply means we can appreciate them by treating them the way they deserve to be, and by doing it each and every day.
A specific day to celebrate our parents can also be a hurtful experience to many. Forgetfulness in celebrating a parent on such a highly publicized occasion can be a sad experience for moms and dads that aren't remembered. Although they may not show it, they know the day has come and gone without being noticed. Those who have lost a parent find the day hard to deal with, especially if they have actively taken part in a celebration in the past. I often joke about the day to my own kids, referring to it as Martyr day instead of Mother's day: that day I'm overwhelmed by Hallmark love, the next day I'm just another person in the house. My kids don't find the joke amusing, probably because there's so much truth to it.
We don't need a specific day to celebrate the love, caring and selflessness that so many parents deserve, it takes a lifetime of love and appreciation to really make it mean something. Is one day a year enough to show how much we care for all they do?
One day could never be; yet the calendar seems to think it can.
So powerful this so-called holiday is, that as I type these words, I wonder what I will be buying my parent's when the calendar states the days are approaching: solidifying that although I know better, I cannot escape a no show or forgetfulness.
Gift shops are counting on my guilt.
To be remembered on a day that society states we should expect to be, really doesn't mean as much as being remembered when we don't expect it. The element of surprise is much more rewarding.
Each and every day of the year is special for those of us with parents, and those of us without them, count on the memories we hold dear of the moms and dads we wish were still here with us. We can celebrate them with our love, memories and words, whether they are on earth to hear them, or in heaven to watch over us. It doesn't take much to show a mom or dad you care; and often, your appreciation comes in how you treat them, what you say, and the simple things you do everyday that show they matter. Have our lives become so busy that we need a "marked" specific occasion to say "I care"? If so, then we certainly need to slow down. Life passes us by much too quickly as it is.
If parents got the respect they deserved, someone wouldn't have invented a day for us to prove we care. Maybe the inventor of this occasion was a parent themselves; one who felt unworthy. To think that, saddens me.
Thank you's, kind words, favors, respect, and a hug once in a while is worth much more then a box of candy. It's more personal, from the heart, and lets parents know that appreciation is there, unprovoked, instead of being shown because some calendar says it's time.
It's always time in the life of a parent; each and every day.
Unfortunately, until the words come off the calendar, I'll still be one of Hallmark's best customers.
Thanks to society's norms.
