ALT-11 Secrets to Enjoying Family Holidays
IT ALL BEGINS WITH ATTITUDE
The key word is "family." Family can mean many things. Some people really don't get along with their family. Others have lost theirs to death, distance or estrangement. This can make enjoying holidays a bigger challenge than those who still have their family intact.
Looking back on family holidays can be a happy pastime, or it can be a cause for sadness and sentimentality.I have great memories of being with family for Thanksgiving and Christmas. I choose to keep these memories dear to my heart and appreciate that I had them. As My family is now deceased, I'm divorced and have no children, holidays could be a time of great unhappiness for me. It isn't because I realize nothing is constant, life changes from moment to moment.This is reality. I've known people who just cannot get past this and they are actually causing their own suffering, when they could be moving forward to new ways of enjoying holiday time.
My childhood memories were great. My family was close, my mother was the center of everything. She spoiled my dad, my sister and I totally. Most of the time, it was the four of us for our holiday dinners. Of course when I became a teen-ager, I wanted to go to my friend's and party with them, but I always did it after being with my family first. As time went on, one by one my family died. First my dad in 1977, then my sister in 1995, and last my mom in 1996. I really had to rethink how to enjoy the holidays and not allow myself to spiral into feeling alone and getting depressed. It took a lot of effort, but it all comes down to attitude. I'm fortunate to have many good friends and most of the time I have the celebrations at my house. Sometimes not. Either way we always have a fine time and enjoy being together.
Strangely enough, one of my best Thanksgivings was on my own. I'd had a medical procedure the day before and really wasn't up to going out, so I cooked my own small turkey, made my special stuffing and a pumpkin pie. That was all I needed. My cat and I just spent the day chilling out and eating when I wanted, doing what I wanted- It was a good day. I think sometimes you just have to go with what you want at the moment, instead of what you think you SHOULD do.
This year it could be a very sad holiday for me. I'm financially strapped and there's a lot of uncertainty in my life. My living conditions are unstable to the point I'm not certain where I'm going to wind up. I don't feel like doing (or can afford) my usual holiday dinner, so I've invited one low-maintenance friend. We're doing a simple dinner and plan on a small outing afterward- something different. Sometimes that's all it takes- just trying something new to make a holiday really enjoyable.
